Where Do Gay Guys Meet

Meeting potential romantic partners isn’t easy for anybody, but it can be significantly harder for gay individuals, who often find themselves struggling to read signals correctly, dealing with assumptions about sexuality from those around them, and grappling with prejudice and lack of understanding on a societal level. So, if you’re a gay guy, how can you meet other gay guys?

There are lots of places you might meet other gay men, depending on your comfort levels and your preferences when it comes to going out. Gay clubs and bars can be excellent options, as can gay dating apps, but if you’d like a slightly gentler start, you could join an LGBTQ+ group that’s not focused on dating, such as a volunteer or hobby group, and make some connections that way.

There are many different approaches that can work, so let’s check out a few of the things you can do in order to increase your chances of connecting with other gay guys and perhaps forming a romantic bond!


1) Volunteer Groups

Meeting gay men at Volunteer Groups

Volunteer groups are a great, low-pressure way to meet gay men, especially if you join ones that are related to the LGBTQ+ cause. There’s always a need for volunteers in this area, and you can serve a very important cause while making connections with other gay men. You’ll often meet individuals who are passionate about helping others, which is often a good starting point.

Of course, you may encounter many straight individuals too, but you’ve got a good chance of meeting gay men, and you’ll probably feel more comfortable making advances if you’re operating in a supportive, caring environment. You’ll also probably enjoy the feel-good factor of giving back to your community.

Even if you don’t meet somebody directly through a volunteer group, you’ll expand your network and significantly increase the chances of finding a partner. If you just want friendship, you’re very likely to find that too!

2) Dating Apps

Dating apps aren’t everybody’s cup of tea, but they certainly have their uses, and they’re particularly good if you’d rather hunt for a potential partner from the comfort of your home, rather than going out. They also have the advantage of ensuring everybody’s on roughly the same page about what they want from the connection.

There are a myriad of dating apps aimed at gay men; you don’t just have to hop on Grindr to connect. Grindr has its moments and there are lots of great people on it, but many gay men would rather have other options. Match has plenty of gay men on it, and there’s also OurTime and EliteSingles.

Any of these can help you make connections that could turn into a steady relationship (or whatever you are looking for), and although they shouldn’t be your only method of seeking out other gay men, they are definitely a tool you should be utilizing.

3) Gay Bars

Gay Bar The Laird in Melbourne

Gay bars, like dating apps, meet with mixed approval; some people love them, but others are a lot less sure about them. However, if you’re an outgoing kind of person and you enjoy a drink or two in the evening, you might find that a gay bar is an ideal place to meet other gay men.

Again, this has the advantage of ensuring that pretty much everybody is on the same page about sexuality, removing some of the uncertainty and misunderstandings that can occur if you attend a regular bar. Of course, you can go to regular bars if you prefer, but you may find it more difficult to connect with gay men; there are likely to be fewer, since a pretty high ratio of the people are likely to be straight.

Bars are a good place to meet others because they tend to have a relaxed, social atmosphere, which makes it easy to maintain a conversation. Many people find it easier to connect with others once they’ve had a drink or two, and this might help you if you’re struggling with nerves. However, if bars don’t do it for you, let’s check out further options!

4) Parades/Events

A parade or march in celebration of LGBTQ+ can be another good place to meet gay men, especially if there’s time to stand around and chat alongside the organized march or activity. You don’t want to go to something so structured you won’t have any time to socialize, but most gay pride events are set up to allow people time to mingle.

This again has the advantage of ensuring you are among allies, which can make it easier to approach people and try to form connections. Parades are usually fun, vibrant events that put everybody in good moods – perfect for meeting others. These aren’t one of the most obvious places to look for romance, but they are definitely an option.

5) Through Friends

You might feel like your network is small, but you’d probably be surprised by just how many people you can connect with if you try. In most cases, your friends will be glad to introduce you to others they know, and this can make it easier to meet gay men. Another benefit is that if they’re friends with your friends, you’re likely to have at least a couple of things in common.

It’s also nice to have this kind of “in,” where somebody you know facilitates the meeting and perhaps breaks the ice a little bit. You don’t have to ask your friends to set you up on dates; just tell them you’re open to meeting new people and you’d like to socialize more.

You may find yourself invited to more events and celebrations, and this can be a very effective way to expand your network. Make new friends and talk to people, and you’re likely to form connections that will help you meet gay men either directly or indirectly. 

A lot of people find this method more comfortable than gay bars or dating apps, although it can be a slower approach.

6) Gay Sports Leagues

Meeting men at sporting clubs

Have you ever thought about joining a gay sports league? If you’re an active person (or you’d like to be an active person), this can be a great way to make connections and maintain a good level of fitness at the same time.

Being part of a team and having a joint goal can help you connect with those around you, so if you’re naturally introverted and struggling to socialize, this structure may help you. Many sports leagues are close-knit and trusting, and this may increase your confidence or even let you find love.

Even if you don’t find “the one” in a sports league, you will make new connections, and those friendships could lead you to a romantic relationship in the future.

7) Join A Group

It’s worth finding out if there are any gay groups focused on hobbies you enjoy – such as an LGBTQ+ games night or a gay acapella group. Gay religious groups, or even support groups can also be good options for increasing your network and getting to know people.

Groups can cater to a vast range of interests, and there are many more than there used to be. You can join LGBTQ+ book groups, hiking groups, fishing groups, sailing groups, sports groups, craft groups, and so much more. These are ideal because they give you a hobby to bond over, and they increase the chances that you will find things you have in common.

Of course, the group doesn’t have to be specifically catering to gay individuals; just joining standard hobby groups could help you connect with other gay men. You have a much greater chance of meeting them in an LGBTQ+ setting, though, so bear this in mind when deciding where to invest your energies. After all, you can only belong to so many social groups!

Online groups can also provide you with connections, although some people hesitate to use these because they want to meet people in person. If you don’t want to start a long-distance relationship, consider looking for local online groups to increase your chances of making friends with people who live nearby.

8) Start A Group

Can’t find a group that seems right for you and your needs? No problem – you can make one! You need to be reasonably outgoing for this, or at least willing to organize behind the scenes and get somebody else involved, but it’s a great solution if there just isn’t a group that meets your needs.

The nice thing about starting a group yourself is that you can decide exactly who your group will be for, and who can join it. If you’re going to meet in person, bear in mind that you will need a space, and the logistics of this can be a little complicated – but worth it if it helps you find a bunch of friends who you feel safe and comfortable with.

Forming an online group is another option, but comes with the same caveats described above. If you’re going to do this, think about how satisfying you find online connections to be, and how you’ll deal with transitioning to in-person if need be in the future.

Gay men groups

9) Community Classes

Joining a local class can be another effective way to meet more people, and by extension, gay guys. There’s no guarantee, of course, but it’s always good to expand your network; you never know when a connection will lead you to a new romantic partner, or just a close friend.

There are often many community classes available in any given area; you can check out your local college for a list of classes, or ask in a library or community center. They are likely to have options available.

Pick a class that genuinely interests you, because otherwise you may find that you don’t get very much from it, even if you do meet some people. Plus, if you’re interested in the subject matter and so are the other attendees, you’re likely to have some common ground, and it will be easier to get to know each other!

Community classes tend to cover a vast range of subjects, with everything from photography to aviation, and from fitness to cooking. They often have positive, enthusiastic atmospheres, because everybody is engaged with the subject and keen to learn – the perfect place for forming new friendships!


There are many different places where gay guys can meet each other; it isn’t limited to gay bars and Grindr. Although these can be options for making connections, more organic and low-pressure ways can offer better results. Hobby groups, community classes, existing network connections, and volunteer groups are all excellent approaches to consider.

Sometimes, meeting new people feels hard, and doubly so when you’re gay in a world that still has a strong heterosexual bias. However, with these tips, you hopefully have some ideas about how to go out and begin forming new connections!

Gay Worlley

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