Getting the terminology and definitions correct is critical, but before we do so – we must first get to grips with the difference between gender and sex.
Demiboy is one such gender identity that refers to someone who identifies themselves to the aspects of masculinity, regardless of their defined sex (i.e what sexual organs they have).
To understand this further, we must delve into the differences and definitions within the gender vs sex category. This guide looks to clear this up further.
Read on to learn more!
Gender Vs Sex
One of the most controversial and misunderstood aspects of this is the understanding of what defines gender and what defines sex. Over the years, members of the LGBTQ community have fought for these terms to be properly defined.
At its most basic, gender is identity defining. Someone may identify as something that is not related to their sex – which is defined usuall at birth or through a scan, by a medical professional such a doctor.
But gender is a spectrum and someone does not have to identify as specifically male or specifically female.
As a result of this, the term demiboy allows for someone to have an identity space where they are aligned with the traits of masculinity in a comfortable setting without having a sex-specific label.
Demiboy, Gender Fluid, Bigender And Transgender
Experts have suggested that there is a difference between being gender fluid and being a demiboy. Gender fluidity can refer to identity changing over time. Additionally, there is a difference to bigender.
Bigender refers to those that identify as both a male and a female fully at the same time – whereas being a demiboy suggests that you have somewhat more of a tie to masculinity and therefore to the male gender.
This further differentiates from transgender which refers to someone who identifies with a gender different from their assigned sex at birth or at a scan.
What Does A Demiboy Look Like?
It’s important that we try to avoid generalizations, but there are many people who identify as demiboys with their own lifestyle blogs and may provide us with an insight into this.
Marcos’ blog for example defines a demiboy’s appearance as being more masculine in nature including a masculine haircut. They avoid female clothes and general female appearances.
Providing Support To Friends/Family
If you have a friend or family member that identifies as a demiboy, you may be wondering how you can provide support to them.
The first thing to remember is to be open minded and non-judgemental. If you can do this, you’ll be best placed for the future – not just for your friend or family member, but for others in the community.
Second, try to listen and learn from them and understand what they are telling you. They may wish to tell you why they feel they belong to their identity and other things that surround it.
Indeed, education on the subject is perhaps one of the most beneficial and important things you can do to provide support to anybody that identifies as a demiboy.
Understanding the correct pronouns to use is one such way you can help. Ask your friend or family member how they would like to be addressed or referred to.
Remember too, it is not your place to determine what identity someone is. It is a personal choice and belongs only to the person themselves.
And this is a very important facet too. Some demiboys are still learning who they are and what identity they are. As a result, it’s entirely possible that they change their identity.
If this happens, remember to remain supportive.
Finally, remember just to be there for your friend or family member. Loneliness is very common among those in the community as they may have felt necessary to hide their identity from others.
You do not want to make your friend or family member feel lonely or as if they cannot confide in you. You want to make yourself available for them at any time of day or night.
When all is said and done, they are your friends and family members and you will love them unconditionally. Be sure to keep doing so!
What Pronouns Do Demiboys Use?
Demiboys often use the pronoun he/him as they typically identify as a masculine person and lean toward the male gender. However, we must also recognize that this is not the case for every person.
Some demiboys may instead use they/them instead. It’s a case of personal preference and how they feel within.
Do Demiboys Have A Flag?
Yes, demiboys have a flag in the LGBTQ community. Whilst the designer of the flag did not explicitly state what the colors represented, many believe that the colors represent the following:
Blue = masculinity, manhood or the male element
White = non binary and agender
Gray = slight, partial or not full connections
When Is Demiboy Pride?
As the recognition of all queer identities is increasing throughout the world, so too are the days to observe each of these identities and celebrate them.
The international demiboy pride day is the 22nd of June. So, if you’re looking to support demiboys – consider putting something on social media that day!
Why Is Definition Important?
It’s important because we do not want to generalize, categorize or label people. It is not our right to tell someone how they should feel or identify themselves.
Additionally, it allows for people to feel connected to an identity that they feel is more closely appropriate to them.
It also further helps to understand the difference between gender and sex, so definition is very useful for overall understanding.
The Bottom Line
Demiboys are people that identify with the male gender and traits but do not necessarily have male genitalia. Once we learn more about these terms, the better placed we will be in the future!
Hello, my name is Gay Worlley - no, really - and I love learning about all things queer. I am also a qualified gardener and enjoy traveling in my spare time.
I love sharing my travel stories with anyone who will listen, and now I want to share them with the world through my new website! Not only that, but I want to inspire others and teach you about LGBTQ+ travel, queer media, pride, and much more.
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